Five (Un)Easy Pieces aka Process & Observation
Those are my feet. I thought this was an apt image for this post.
I’m waiting for the roofing guy to arrive so I can fork over a big fat wad of cash. I could be painting. I should be painting. With multiple deadlines looming, a house full of unfinished paintings and ideas flying out my ass at the speed of light you’d think I’d be painting. Painting in this situation would make sense, right? But things don’t always make sense, and I don’t feel like painting because lately my teeth start to itch every time I pick up a paint brush. In the interest of full disclosure I should tell you here that I’m a big proponent of the nonsensical. Even still, I’m none too happy about the current situation. I want to want to paint. I want to finish something, anything, every freaking damn unfinished piece of crap piece of art that’s taking up valuable space in this drafty, old, squirrel infested, money sucking, yarmulke wearing* house! But as the scrawny, fat-lipped aging rock star continues to crow, “You can’t always get what you want.”
hey look! Some unfinished artwork lying around–a typical scene.
That piece on the right is part of a set of five I’ve been working on since last winter. What do you call a set of five anyway, a pentich? That’s an early stage there. And here it is looking a little more developed.
sunning itself with friends mid summer:
group photo in front of the shed:
hanging out in the living room today:
So these paintings, they’re getting there. Where? I’m still not exactly sure. I’m never clear on the destination until I arrive, and by that I mean I’ll probably continue to consider and reject final directions until one random day when I pick up a paint brush and my teeth feel fine and something small but significant happens. I really think this group is nearly finished. I’ve thought that for months, and the theoretical completion possibilities have recently narrowed to what feels like a manageable pool of ideas.
One more look as it is:
And that’s the “sad truth” or not so sad really. It’s just the way things go. Production levels rise and fall. It’s best to try and keep a positive perspective, to remember that times like this are great for recharging. I’m not crazy about being in this sort of in-between state where I can’t seem to be productive in terms of finishing work, but dwelling on the negative side of it will only make it last longer.
Current list of things to do to try and stay positive:
- draw on the sidewalk
- take the camera on a walk
- jump off the shed roof into a giant pile of leaves
see you later,
-Steph
*the blue beanie
November 21, 2009 at 10:45 am
It is the nature of living to bounce. Tumbled along on this entropy powered roller coaster. I’ve got paintings I started last feburary that are still cluttering up my space. Too many distrtactions. Loss of interest. Floors rotting out, and my pet dying to name a few.. That is a large project you got going and they take a large amount of time. But, like you say when it is not there it’s not there.
I do feel that solutions to blocks are infinite, just like painting. One of the many anwsers will find you. Me, in the mean time am playing the bass (badly,) in a band bidding my time.
November 21, 2009 at 11:08 am
hey Smitty! Bounce–you have a way of framing things that moves everything that much closer to making sense. I always appreciate your perspective. Still wish we were neighbors.
November 21, 2009 at 3:15 pm
I don’t know why, but your pieces remind me of the first time I tried burning holes in a piece of paper with a magnifying glass. It was the first demonstration of focus or concentration of an element at age ten or thereabouts.
I don’t envy your roofers working so close to possible snowfall, or the fact that it is a steep roof. My brother did his own himself a few years back with a little family help. He didn’t listen to us when we told him to only to one side at a time in case it rained. Then he could tarp it from the side that wasn’t torn off. Well, it did rain and he got black mold growing inside his walls. One insurance-connected restoration crew botched the repairs and he had them stop under advice of a more reputable restorer. Two of his kids already had asthma. All totalled they paid out $110,000 for damages when the house was appraised at $159,000. The insurance company dropped him. No surprise there, though it was no fault of his for sticking up for himself.) Then they sold it to move into a house that didn’t have any mold. (The mold never tested out as fully abated when they were done.) It was a 100 year-old Craftsman with a cantilevered front porch which I had done some work on through the years and grew quite fond of. He bought it condemned for $30,000. It had foundation problems.
Anyway, besides my home repair nightmare story, I just want to say that I like the work you’ve put up today.
November 21, 2009 at 7:48 pm
thanks, Andrew!
OY! Hopefully you’re brother used up his allotment of bad luck with that awful experience! Mold is one tough menace.
I know it sucks it’s getting so late in the year and they’re only just going to be starting work on the roof next week. There’s just been one thing after another in the way and getting this going has taken quite a while. On the bright side, we’re still having gorgeous weather much of the time. I was comfortable raking leaves in a tank top this afternoon! Fingers crossed it keeps up til the roof is finished!
November 23, 2009 at 10:00 am
What about cutting holes in wood instead? Something about cutting holes into canvas really bothers me. I don’t know what it is.
November 23, 2009 at 3:42 pm
Tom, you’ll be happy to hear there’s no canvas involved. They’re one inch deep panels–masonite cradled with pine. What made you think they were canvas? Hmmn? What? Whamadjyathinkthat, eh?
November 23, 2009 at 3:08 pm
I have to say that usually – not sometimes or occasionally but usually- the last part of a piece or pieces takes me much longer to finish than anything else. Occasionally something turns out gangbusters the first time around, but much more often something is a little off and the process of determining what and making the final change just involves a lot of pointless staring. Like that image of Rothko lounging on a deck chair staring at his painting. I may even know exactly what I need to do, but put it off for months for some reason. I don’t know whether to give me time to rethink it or just because I need to become completely familiar with piece as it looks and the potential change before actually doing it.
Or it could be because the pieces are far enough along that I see the finish line, and don’t have any reason to sprint towards it. I don’t know, but I understand where you are here. The important thing is not to stress out about it.
When art just isn’t calling to me I will ofte decide to just put it completely aside. Or else do nothing but minor maintentance while otherwise focusing my attention on a video game or book I’m reading. Or just going out and carousing. I force myself to be away from art and don’t let myself stress out about it. After a few weeks, I start getting some desire to get back into it, but hold it back a little longer so that when I do finally allow myself back at it, it’s like a treat I’ve been postponing instead of a chore I’m procrastinating. Framing is everything and stressing myself out needlessly doesn’t do much but motivate me to escape the stressor.
I really really like these pieces, especially the first one you post isolated (second photo down) with the green blob to the side. I think that one looks completely perfect as is. I also love the whole you bored through them, but then I would, wouldn’t I.
November 23, 2009 at 4:11 pm
Ah! That’s JUST how it is! Thank you, Hastings. It’s SO often this way for me in the end stages of a piece. The biggest frustration this time is that so much of what I’m working on has landed in that state at the same time, and I have a handful of other stuff going which seems so much less important except that I need to finish it for fast approaching deadlines. bleh.
I know you’re totally right about the not stressing thing. Still. I end up having to talk myself out of it way too often. It doesn’t help that I suddenly have insomnia again which gives me hours on end to spend obsessing over every negative aspect of my life. And to top it all off, today I seem to have LOST a painting! *maniacal laughter* Maybe I just need to reintroduce heavy drinking into my repertoire. That would actually be a really convenient solution since it’s raining today which means my recent solution–going outside to get away from it and sucking up sunshine to boost my mood–isn’t going to happen. There’s a pub just at the end of my block.
On the bright side, I’m actually taking a break from painting right now. I’ve gotten in a few decent hours today which is the most I’ve managed in a while. And reading your comments here made me feel alot better. Thanks.
I love my hole saw.